Money Talk Matters

This was one of those mornings when couples were heavily on my mind and it was best that I write out these posts because someone is in need of guidance. It doesn’t matter if they cannot send in an email but prayerfully, they will be led to these posts.

All too often I have heard about the husband being the breadwinner and controlling the money, the wife is home with the kids has to ask for money. Then when she gets money it is very limited – when I say limited it is just enough or some have said barely enough to take care of the things she needs to do for the household.

This results in the wife becoming resentful towards the husband and he is unaware. This happens for several reasons because instead of the wife seeing him as a husband she feels as if he is a parent and she is in the role of a kid asking for money; there was not a clear discussion on finances for the household and based on the husband’s upbringing – the man bringing home the money and controlling it has led to that same pattern in his marriage which he has not focused on whether it is good or not, but continuing that pattern he saw.

Now I can assure you, if husbands knew this was happening with their wives where the perception was the wives were feeling like a child instead of an equal partner, some would change that.

Having a husband that is controlling the money and having to ask for money also leads to some financial challenges in the future. What would happen if the husband could not work? Does the wife now start working and trying to figure out how to manage the household finances? What if he became injured? WIVES wherever you are, if you are reading this and in this position, yes you are the wife and you are a woman. You need to know how to manage money in and out of marriage.

Remember, before you got married you were on your own. You do not have to lose yourself in marriage but learn how to work as a team. That means work together with the finances, including each other and not making one person feels as if they have to ask permission to have some money. That could eventually sink a relationship.