Posts Tagged ‘engagement’
The economy has had its effects on many relationships especially for those that are engaged. Brides and grooms are having to cut costs where they can in order to have the wedding of their dreams. Sure they are compromising on different things and some have even gone the route of DIY. I tell you what, I am an artsy girl in a different kind of way and don’t think I would have been doing a lot of DIY. Hmmm, let me think about this as I write… my husband actually did our wedding announcements because he works in the printing industry.
When it came to the flowers, I went to a local florist and chose my bouquet and the boutonneire that I wanted my him to wear. So there were some things that we did handle. We had a Justice of the Peace wedding because we knew what our financial situation was and did not want to incur more debt due to our wedding.
I have repeatedly been reading different articles and getting some anonymous notes on the back end of my blog regarding how the economy has been affecting the bride and groom. This week, I will be talking about different situations regarding the money and the bride and groom. Stay tuned…
Of course as I was trying to call it a night, one of my all time favorite movies was coming on – Legally Blonde. What’s a girl to do, turn in or sit up, watch it and share financial lessons on the blog. Hmmm, since you are reading this you know what I chose.
At the beginning the character Elle is expecting her boyfriend Warner to propose to her tonight. She goes with her friends and chooses a dress that she will wear. They go to dinner and he wants to discuss their future. She is sooo prepared for him to ask her and since he is going to Harvard, says his family’s expecting a lot from him and Harvard’s going to be hard.
Here comes the line, that’s why Elle, Poo bear, I think its time for us to.. she says I accept and he says break up. His bottomline is if he is going to be a senator he needs to confirm to what his family will approve of. WOW! He tells her he needs a Jackie and not like he has a choice. She walks out.
I wonder right now, how many relationships have ended because a family member did not approve. Don’t get me wrong – when many people are telling the bride or groom they should not marry a certain person – yes, they should be listening. However, when a family is degrading their son or daughter’s choice because they are not who they would choose — what I say to the son or daughter is this… you know who you love, will be with you through thick and thin regardless of easy or difficult times. You are the one that has to live with this person at the end of the day not your family. Make sure you know who you love, like and why.
Another lesson from this movie was that Elle decided that she would attempt to become the person that would go to Harvard. She studies with her sorority group for the LSATs and she gets into Harvard. Of course Warner was stunned to see her on campus.
Lesson: Be true to who you are and not try to conform to someone’s opinion of you. That will only lasts so long.
Come back tomorrow as we discuss more lessons.
I was not going to point this one out however, as much as I tried not to post it, it kept coming up. Remember the Jilted Bride that was Awarded $150,000. Take a look.
According to the post I read, “he testified he had taken her on several trips and paid $30,000 of her debt while they were engaged. Then he found out she had even more debt so he called it off! In my opinion sounds like he dodged a life of financial frustration if she had that amount of debt and more.
When you get into the habit of paying off a future spouse’s debt even prior to getting married, this can open the door for them to create more if they are shoppers and feel as if they have been given a new lease on life. Why? Because they may believe you have a soft spot and think they can create debt and run to you to clean it up.
Whatever debt you create prior to your marriage and engagement is your responsibility to clean up. Not your future spouse! It is not written in stone anywhere they they must pay off your bills even once you are married. Your credit is individual. Brides and grooms both need to beware and pay attention to the financial obligations that exist prior to getting married.
Brides and grooms to be need to pay attention while they are engaged to obvious situations that are red flags that should not be ignored instead of being caught up in “I’m So in Love I will deny what’s in front of me”. I was doing some research and came across this titled Royal Wedding called off amid cheating claims
The Princess chose to call off the wedding because “HER” future groom was “intimate” with a college student. I must say it sends a message that she is not willing to settle, nor overlook the indiscretion. What you accept during the engagement says it is okay once you are married. Therefore, she clearly sent a message by breaking it off.
Both Brides-to-be and grooms-to-be must pay attention. Yes, when dating and even during engagement people will put their best foot foward and that is a good thing. You must also listen to what they say and watch their behavior. Non-verbal cues can also give you insight into what they say and do.