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Posts Tagged ‘financial responsibility’

postheadericon Money Wisdom

We all use money whether daily, every other day or weekly. Mortgages, apartments, groceries, car insurance, and more. Money has many roles in life and one key factor is recognizing all the roles that money plays in your life.

Some may say what makes us different is the way we manage money. I beg to differ because many of us are managing money the same… Trial and Error! Mismanaging money, checks bouncing, shortage in the account versus a surplus and even incurring debt. Not balancing the checkbook, not even writing down in the register when you write a check or even record an ATM deduction and payment. That in itself could set you on the path for financial stress.

Financial stress does not have to be a part of life. There are people that do not even have financial stress and strain. Let me share this – the person or people that are successful with money possess several traits:

1) Responsibility – They take responsibility for their finances and the choices they make when it comes to money. They are thinking about the long-term consequences and not just short-term spur of the moment band-aids.

2) Does not Procrastinate – They do not procrastinate when it comes to addressing a financial issue. They meet it head on and take steps to solve the issue. They don’t wait until tomorrow to address a situation because they know tomorrow never comes.

3) Not in Denial – They are not in denial about their finances. If there is a shortage in their finances, they review their finances and make adjustments where necessary.

4) Mindset – Their mindset is right about their finances. They are continuously learning money skills and not holding themselves captive because of past mistakes. They recognize that if their attitude is not right, they could invite financial stress and strain back into their lives.

5) Speech – They are not speaking negatively about their own life. They are not the ones constantly complaining instead they look at the situation for what it is and speak the solution.

6) Vision – These people have vision about where they want to go with their finances. They set financial goals, reach them and exceed them.

What makes us different is our problem solving capabilities. When faced with a financial issue, how do you solve it? Denial, avoidance, blaming someone else or do you take charge? Our problem solving capabilities are not necessarily new and something that we have been doing for a long time.

Have you been avoiding your financial situation because you think you can wish it away? Avoidance, denial or even procrastination is not the answer. In order for 2011 to be different, you have to take action now in 2010.

If you read this post and need financial counseling, go to www.moneytalkmatters.com/products and scroll down to Individual Counseling.

postheadericon Response to Money and Marriage Solo Effort

Based on the response and questions that came in after the post Money and Marriage as a Solo Effort, I thought it was best to take each question one by one and address them in a post. Take the time to read the original post about Money and Marriage as a Solo Effort if you do not understand the response.

Question 1: 

What about marriages where the husband dumps all financial responsibility on his wife (including making all income) and is quite happy living in his own little world, pottering about, working occasionally at a “fun”, low stress, low pay, part-time job, oblivious to bills and all other responsibilities? Disappears upstairs to play computer games when he comes home. Doesn’t want to know about finances, doesn’t care. I’d love to know if anyone has found a solution to this relationship/finances issue.

Answer:  Dear MF: Let me ask you this question, did the marriage start out this way where the finances were dumped on the wife and the husband had withdrawn into his own world? I imagine you are going to tell me no. If you say no it did not start out that way then answer these questions:

1) What happened for this behavior to become the norm?

2) What was the wife’s role in accepting this new behavior because there came a certain time in the relationship when she deemed this was okay and it has continued. However, now she is not happy with it.

3) Has the wife sat down and tried to talk about finances with her husband in a manner that was more of informative versus panic or frustration? Finances are a part of life. Is he not concerned with eating, living, driving to work, etc.

It is not all the husband’s fault. I am not condoning the behavior – focus on what I am saying.  The wife needs to look at her role in what is happening in their household. Both have some responsibility for what is happening in the marriage right now. Whether or not both of take control for the benefit of the marriage will be up to you and the husband. Do not be so quick to point the figure and say it is your fault. You had a role and still do in what is happening in your home. What’s your next move?

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