Money Talk Matters

Posts Tagged ‘individuals’

This is one of those things that I have always known because some become professional athletes at such a young age and are bombarded with limelight, money and opportunities that they are not necessarily prepared for. I came across this story tonight and could not resist sharing it, it is titled Taking Vows in a League Hit Hard by Divorce.

This story shares that 78% of NFL players are bankrupt, divorced or jobless. WHOA! That statistic says that they are not being protected nor surrounded by people that are truly looking out for their best interest long term. There is absolutely NO REASON on GOD’s Green earth why these individuals should end up bankrupt or jobless.  I had to say it that way.

This is the way I see it - their job is to play football but is not a reason for them to neglect their marriage.  It still takes work – TEAMWORK as a matter of fact. The wife cannot feel as if she is doing all the work. Furthermore, the athlete should not be made to feel as if he is strictly a cash machine.

There is sooo much in this article but another thing I want to point out is it says, “When athletes retire, most face an identity crisis. Many do not retire on their own terms, and once they leave the game, they also leave behind the fame and fortune, the crowds and adoration. Their wives experience a similar loss of status.”  Wives need to have their own identity whether they are married to a professional athlete or not because as soon as that person stops that particular position she could easily fall into depression. That does not help that husband in any way shape or form, especially if he did not leave that position on his own terms.

Athletes and wives should be taking the time to establish who they are outside of his job. What are your dreams and goals? If he was not a professional athlete what would both of you be doing? What is it you would do if you had to retire today?

Being a professional athlete does not define who you are. Put a plan in place so that when the job is done, you can move on to the next phase of your life with minimal stress and disarray to your household.

Read the article and share your thoughts here.

I knew last night when I saw the story that said $2M wedding called off by NBA’s Jefferson that I would have to do some more research. In the story I read last night, he called it off in time for her to notify her friends, but his friends got to come out and party on him.

Glad I waited until today to write about it.

According to a NY Post story, he was quoted as saying, “If you aren’t 100% certain about something, you shouldn’t do it.” I commend him on seeing things for what it was and the fact that he was not doing this for people but for himself.

So many people get caught up in the wedding planning that the ignore obvious signs that should be addressed and then once they are married, it’s as if they are seeing the spouse for the first time. In reality, the person did not change it is just that the other person is now focused on this spouse and not “a wedding”.

Sure it might be hard for this young lady at first, but this could be the best thing for both. This gives them time to reflect on who they are as individuals before they enter a serious, committed relationship.

You can read more of the story here – NBA’s Jefferson married to the sport ’til death

When the story first came out in our local news, I could not believe it. Unfortunately, what some people call “love” makes them do crazy things – should not resort to illegal activity.

Story is titled Ex-tax worker says she stole $11 million for love. At the end of the day, she stole the money and was giving it to him. Of course, he was married. She was using the money to lure him from his wife.

I must ask this question: Why do people lose their “NATURAL” mind when it comes to money and what they perceive as love? As a result of this lady’s actions, she is serving a 24 yr prison term. She doesn’t get him. He is on trial now for theft, forgery, racketeering, etc. Before you ask – sure they have turned on each other.

The actions of both individuals have already affected more than just him. Apparently in the story it says he was paying child support. So there will be a child that is not seeing a parent. Once again, there’s a wife that will be dealing with consequences based on husband’s actions.

These stories are heartbreaking because a lot of people are being hurt in the end. Not just the immediate people involved. Do not let money control you and cause you to commit crimes, reck families and put you in danger.

Tip: You should control money – not be controlled by money.

This must be one of those days where I focus on credit and its affects on individuals, marriages and students. As I was doing my research, the words Credit Karma made me stop and want to read more. Probably because the word Karma was in the title. If you are like me and immediately thought about the word Karma and its meaning, the good or bad felt that you generate. Another way of saying it, what you put out there comes back to you.

Therefore, when I saw Credit Karma I had to stop and see what it was saying. Actually Credit Karma is a website that provides free financial advice and credit scores to consumers. Today they are adding a new tool that aids users in understanding the components behind the credit score.

Beware: to utilize this service it does require users to give SSN and Date of Birth.

As an individual, married couple, student it is good to be knowledgeable in the area of credit, what is available, what to use and what not to use. We both know that “Credit” can be used to your benefit or detriment. Get all the information you can in order to make informed decisions when it comes to credit cards and various services that give you the option to monitor your credit and credit report.

The first movie that I want to talk about is Fireproof. Understand this is my opinion as a money and marriage advocate and personal finances educator. Fireproof was a good movie overall. From the money and marriage aspect – clearly they were not on the same page regarding finances in the marriage. He had “his money” and she had “her money”. The husband had drawn those lines in the very beginning of the movie. I would’ve like them to show more detail on why he had drawn those lines. Reason: there are couples that deal with that and don’t understand because they are driven by their emotion.

When you have His Money and Her Money in a marriage, those lines are not drawn without reason. This could help couples understand each other’s motivation for some of the choices that they make.

There came a point in the movie where he did use “His Money” for a need that was important to her. Although she thought someone else did it until she did some background checking. Then she was convicted herself about her own thoughts.

Overall: It is a good movie. That was my take on the money and marriage side.

Recommendation: When you have His Money and Her Money, establish clear reasons upfront the reason it needs to be this way. Otherwise the separation of money can lead to separation in other areas of marriage and open the door for lack of trust in many areas. Know why you are choosing separate funds. All choices have consequences good, bad or indifferent. Do not make any decision lightly.

Day in and day out life happens. We talk about things on the news, friends and relatives. We talk about our children, neighbors and even our jobs. Yet, when we talk about money it might not necessarily pertain to our situation. We talk about we need to buy this or that and usually that is the extent of the conversation.

With the economy being as it is, couples and individuals are being forced to communicate about money. What is interesting is some do not even know where to start or how to have the “Money Talk”. There are couples that have been married for years and have paid the bills, bought houses, cars, etc yet the “Money Talk” has not been what it should be.

Now is a prime opportunity to begin a new foundation and establish the “Money Talk” for your relationship. Regardless of the economy, Money Talk Matters for one simple fact if nothing else, that is money has many roles in our lives. It is not something to be taken lightly but necessary in every day life.

Begin the “Money Talk” today and recognize that it is not a one time conversation. It is an ongoing conversation. Take the first step and start today. You are welcome to post your comments.

Welcome to Money Talk Matters. I invite you to take a look throughout this site. You will find information, resources, interviews and answers to every day personal finance questions. 

You will learn about the different roles of money in your life, guidance for individuals, engaged couples, married couples and even military servicemembers, their spouses and families.

Whether you are re-evaluating your finances, cleaning up old debt, preparing to walk down the aisle or even searching for answers in a time when the economy appears to be grim, MONEY TALK MATTERS.

You are invited to send in a question that you would like to have answered. Know that you will be given recommendations on personal finance issues and at the end of the day, the responsibility is yours to choose what you will or will not do.