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Posts Tagged ‘Marriage Fishbowl’

I want to share today a firsthand account of “The Marriage Fishbowl”. The marriage fishbowl just doesn’t apply to people in high profile offices, but it also applies to people in ministries, certain high profile atheletes and much more.

I remember when my husband and I were dating, there were people in my class at the time that did not like us being together. It happens and I am sure some of you can relate. We represent happiness and true love. Not judging someone based on appearances and other people’s opinion.

At the time we were dating, I was attending ministry school. We got engaged while I was in school and married about two months prior to graduation. There were people that were watching our every move – did he treat me well, how do they act in pubic and etc. Some went so far as to say we would not make it. There was at least one or two other couples that formed based on our relationship because they felt our marriage had given them the green light to marry outside of their race. My husband and I knew that GOD brought us together so we were not marrying each other out of rebellion to our parents or anything of that nature.

So we felt like we had been in the fishbowl. In a few months we will be celebrating 14 yrs of marriage. We have an unconditional love and are both givers. That definitely makes all the difference in the world.

It does not take being The First Family to be in “The Marriage Fishbowl.” More than likely it is happening right there in your own community.

I was watching CNN a few days ago when they were discussing the NY Times Reporter’s interview with The First Family regarding their marriage and it is very evident they are in what I like to call “The Marriage Fishbowl”.

The Marriage Fishbowl is clearly where everyone is watching your every move that the husband and wife make. Did he do this? Did she do that? What was the response? How do they handle this or that? Being in the marriage fishbowl will cause your marriage to be critiqued by some, praised by others, some will remain silent in wonder, there are couples that will try to live up to your representation of marriage and much more.

With Barack and Michelle Obama, clearly based on the interview facts are facts:

1) He had not lived in the home full-time since 1996. So being in the position they are in now is a good thing. Togetherness.

2) Date night is important to them. Yet it was criticized because of how he did it a year ago.

3) Family is important to them and he makes time for his wife and daughters despite being The President.

4) It was shared that there was a very stressful time in their marriage.

Life Lessons to Accept:

1) We all have a role in our marriage. When the other spouse is not there full-time, we take care of business and do what needs to be done especially when there are children involved. You do not let things fall apart.

2) Marriage takes teamwork. Communication is very important. Not arguing but talking with cool heads.

3) Wives and husbands are to support each other in their individual and mutual goals. VISION is important and know where you are going.

4) Date night is important because it gives you time to enjoy your relationship and each other.

Money was not a topic but I want to interject. Discussing money is very important and would alleviate financial mistakes. Because that too is something that is watched when you are in “The Marriage Fishbowl”.

What do you think it takes to make a marriage work? Leave your comments.

We will discuss “The Marriage Fishbowl” again.